The story is told of the day the pope received a call from a McDonald's executive.

The fast food giant wanted to make a gift of one billion dollars to the church, in exchange for one small concession. From now on, the Lord's Prayer would have to read, "Give us this day our daily hamburger."

Naturally, the pope was horrified, and refused to accept this offer. But the executive was persistent, the amount of the gift was increased, and finally the pope reluctantly agreed.

Calling together the College of Cardinals, the pope announced, "I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that McDonald's is giving us a gift of five billion dollars.

"The bad news is that we've lost the Wonder Bread account."

Sure, we laugh at "daily hamburgers" and "Wonder Bread accounts." But Big Macs are no joke. At least not in Italy these days, where one theologian is asking the very serious question: Are hamburgers a sin?

Yes, it's true. A Roman Catholic priest from Tuscany has added fuel to the fires of Italy's debate over fast food by condemning the hamburger, French fries and Coke as "the fruit of a Protestant culture."

"Fast food reflects the individualistic relation between man and God introduced by Luther," the Rev. Massimo Salani said in a full-page interview published last fall in a Catholic daily newspaper. In addition, he insisted that fast food lacks "the community aspect of sharing."

With Italians deeply divided over the arrival of McDonald's and other fast-food chains in a country that takes its three-hour lunches almost as seriously as soccer, other newspapers leapt on the story with obvious glee.

"Theologian Excommunicates the Hamburger," proclaimed a headline in a Rome paper. "The individualistic relation between man and God, started by Luther, is also reflected in the world of eating," said the priest. But his venom was not directed only toward Protestants -- the Father also criticized Catholics who eat too much, and Muslims who do not have "a balanced diet." (Peggy Polk, "First the Reformation, Then the Indigestion?" Religion News Service, November 18, 2000)

Perhaps the priest is right: We have a preference for the wrong style of eating, wolfing down super-sized Quarter-pounders, fries and Cokes in an effort to quickly gratify the desires of the flesh. In his letter to the Galatians, the apostle Paul warns us about those actions which simply make our earthly flesh feel good, and he gives us a menu of tasty and tempting vices that he knows are hard to resist: Fornication, impurity, licentiousness, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, anger, quarrels, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, and carousing (5:19-21).

Quite a selection. Would you like fries with that?

But this is not the nourishment that God wants us to take in. "Live by the Spirit," says Paul, "and do not gratify the desires of the flesh" (v. 16). Resist the fleeting feelings of satisfaction that come from gulping down a meal made up of one or more of these vices: Fornication, licentiousness, drunkenness, and carousing. Just say "no thanks" to sorcery, strife, quarrels, dissensions and envy. Stay away from the temptations of impurity, idolatry, enmities, factions, jealousy and anger.

Admit it. You know that even ANGER can be tempting, and can satisfy our human hunger for a moment or two. In fact, observes author Frederick Buechner, anger is possibly the most fun of the Seven Deadly Sins. Yes, the most fun. "To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back -- in many ways it is a feast fit for a king."

But anger is not very nutritious. The chief drawback, says Buechner, is that what you are wolfing down is yourself. (Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking: A Seeker's ABC [San Francisco: HarperSanFrancisco, 1993], 2)

So let's resist these cheap and easy fast-food vices, and focus instead on the fruit of the Spirit. Paul wants us to fill ourselves with qualities that can truly nourish us and help us to grow into the spiritually healthy and vigorous people that God wants us to be. The fruits we are invited to feast on are "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control" (vv. 22-23). These qualities can fill us, satisfy us, and strengthen us -- and best of all, no spiritual dietitian or gastronomic theologian will say that such fruit is bad for you. Go ahead, eat all you want. Stuff yourself to the bursting point. Paul insists that there "is no law against such things" (v. 23).

The fruit of the Spirit is good food, not fast food. The fruit of the Spirit is never going to be a hamburger -- if, by a hamburger, we mean an entree that is cooked, wrapped, and rushed to a ravenous customer in a matter of minutes. No, the fruit we should be interested in is slow food, food that takes time to cultivate and develop, food that is not going to be available at a quick and convenient drive-through window.

If the fruit of the Spirit is good food, then yes -- a hamburger IS a sin. And maybe it deserves to be excommunicated.

In our ever-accelerating world, we should take the time to focus on the slow and careful growth of spiritual fruit. The art of living -- especially Christian living -- is about learning how to give time to each and every thing. To love. To joy. To peace. To patience. To kindness. To generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. These things take time, but they are the best possible investment of the time we are given.

They also require community. Christianity is based on a shared Communion meal and life together in the Body of Christ -- not on fast food pit stops and individualistic approaches to the faith. It is within the community that Paul challenges us to become "slaves to one another" through love, resisting the temptation to use our Christian freedom "as an opportunity for self-indulgence" (v. 13).

It's like the Italian theologian said: Fast food lacks "the community aspect of sharing." Fast food is as deficient as "fast faith" -- an approach to Christianity that is rushed and individualistic.

Let's spend our time wisely, and spend it together, cultivating the fruit of the Spirit and creating a healthy rhythm for our lives. Let's take a few moments for meditation during our "Sabbath silence" this morning, and during every Sunday morning through the summer. We need to give time to each and every thing that matters, and to stop wasting time on activities that consume us.

Fast food approaches have got to go.

At least in a life of faith that is good and slow.

Let's take a few moments now to allow God's Word to take root in our hearts … Amen.